New Years Resolutions: Natural, Ahead of the Crowd and Actually Effective!
Want your new years resolutions to actually be ideas that make a difference this year? Give this “go even deeper” process a try.
The government says I’m old enough to retire but SSI ignores my personas that are overdue for retirement. Like my “likable guy,” that came alive after my mom’s sudden death when I was eleven. It became how I manipulated people to get (the illusion of) love. It became so good it charmed our way onto TV, into business leadership, even political position, but along the way it also proved too needy, passive-aggressively abandoned two marriages and blocked many an opportunity for real closeness. It was never real and should have long ago been retired.
Another part still in play is the spoiled only-child who pretends to play well with others, but totally resents anyone telling him what to do. He’s chased away allies by insisting on getting his way. This part has got to retire. There’s an amazing legacy opportunity on my plate for 2017 and I’ll need all the help I can get to manifest its potential. Please visit the “prickly little boy” exhibit when you’re at the museum.
So if those two represent what not to do in the coming year. Who, beside the Great Mystery, should join me in the cockpit in 2017?
I’m bringing a Breathing Control Officer on board – not to co-pilot, but to take the controls. I’ve pretended to be a yogi for 50 years now. It’s time to commit to constantly, consciously breathing as my KEY life management tool! If you don’t see my eyes trying to roll up into my head, slap me awake because I’m stuck in Thinkaholism again.
As much as I’ve tried to avoid it – what’s true is that breath is at the root of life. Weak unconscious breathing allows those parts of me that should be in the museum back into my life. When I am breathing badly and stressed, I flail and fail to be my best self. Starting now I will end the chaos by breathing consciously, slowly and deeply enough to be able to regulate my energy down when stressed or confused soI can feel at peace and, I can instantly energize and empower myself when in doubt, danger, feeling weak or tired.
I’m also adding a mechanic to the team. Promoting to officer status that part of me that respects “zen and the art of life maintenance.” It’s the part that likes to get its hands dirty and patiently figure out how to do something that’s not intuitive, easy and about words. It’s the part that wants to actually understand the plot instead of just bullshitting a good story. It’s role is to see details and doing as spiritual matters so I stop thinking of them as chores to avoid. A powerful, patient mechanic will be vital to that legacy project and to my new life with the wife as a handyman farmer on a 10+ acre hobby farm in Eastern Canada.
This essay arose from one of my coaches challenging me to answer the question “What changes do you need to make in your life in 2017?”… adding that no matter what I think is the answer, no matter how I define myself, what label I think fits, I can go deeper – beyond all labels, easy answers and any stories that fit my cultural or personal history. I imagine the deepest jewel of this inquiry is still waiting to be revealed as the breathing and sacred doing work their magic…
I invite you to take a deep dive like this into a more meaning-full way of making your resolutions for 2017. I’m blessed if I’m able to help you do it…